Executive Presence : Assessment, Coaching, Training

5 Ways to be More Likeable at Work

5 Ways to be More Likeable at Work

Summary: The truth about leaders who seem like they are not likeable is that they do not pay enough attention to build relationships with their stakeholders. This makes them miss out on the opportunity to connect with their stakeholders authentically and know them holistically. To be perceived as a likeable leader with strong executive presence, an appealing and friendly attitude helps. For that, the secret sauce is to find commonality between you and the other person.

The ideal relationship between a leader and employees involves some degree of likeability. How can a leader make themselves more likeable? Should you tell jokes, buy pizzas, or chit-chat with others about their weekends? You could do any of the above or something else that is in your comfort zone as long as you make time to find some commonality outside of work. A benefit of commonality and then having highly likeable leaders is that they uphold enduring relationships with little effort and in most cases also easily bring in new business.

Joining as a part-time cashier during her college days, Ann-Marie Campbell climbed the corporate ladder to become the Executive Vice-President of all the U.S. stores of Home Depot. That put around 2000 stores and its nearly 400,000 employees under her supervision. Regardless, she carries out store visits where she personally communicates with the employees in face-to-face meetings. She talks about the common goals of focusing on providing the best services to their customers. This allows for her employees to take part in the decision-making process directly as well. What Ann-Marie does, makes her very approachable even though she’s a senior-level leader in a giant corporation.

As crucial as this factor is for an executive leader, what should one do to have a more pleasing disposition at work? Here are 3 strategies to help you increase your likeability quotient at the workplace and project a great personality.

Find Shared Interests

It might need two people more than commonality to keep their bond intact, but nevertheless, the commonality is what makes that bond possible in the first place. Star salesmen are the best people to learn this from. They make it a point to relate to their potential customers who they know virtually nothing about. Try to know the person’s hobbies, look at what they put on their desks at work, and gather up clues while talking to them; try to know what it is that you two could bond over.

Become Familiar with your Connections

The easiest way to cover the miles between acquaintanceship and friendship is through familiarity. Why do people from the same department always like to sit together for lunch? The reason is that familiarity brings in a level of comfort. This comfortability helps in building further commonality over time as well. So, go out there, and try to have a real conversation with people instead of dropping their messages on the phone.

Build your Muscle of Curiosity

DId you know that curious people are more likely to attract others? It’s such a delight to be around someone who is always curious, has a good sense of interest, and basically just radiates pure inquisitiveness through their persona. Radiating curious energy helps you find commonality. Who would instead want to be with someone who’s always disinterested, indifferent, just generally transactional?

Impact on Leadership

According to the social exchange theory, a person expects both social and economic outcomes out of an interaction.1 Research suggests that being likeable increases the chances of collaboration in an interaction.2 Even if people give a thought to the economical costs, when you are likeable, they are still more likely to collaborate and negotiate with you. Hence, your leadership needs to have a personal touch where only you know how to make people around you enjoy your company.

Star Mindset

As an executive coach, I ask my clients to understand that being likeable is not their job but being approachable is. While people don’t tend to give enough credit to the likeability factor, it plays a significant role in building a basic rapport with a person. If you don’t find someone likeable enough, chances are that you’ll try your best to avoid them, even if you find them competent.

3 Immediately Applicable Action Steps

  1. Ask more questions about the other person. 
  2. Put in the effort in initiating face-to-face conversations to know the person at a deeper level
  3. Look for commonality in personal, social, and professional settings whenever you can,

References

  1. Hansen, S. D., Alge, B. J., Brown, M. E., Jackson, C. L., & Dunford, B. B. (2012). Ethical Leadership: Assessing the Value of a Multifoci Social Exchange Perspective. Journal of Business Ethics, 115(3), 435–449. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10551-012-1408-1

  2. Pulles, N. J., & Hartman, P. (2017). Likeability and its effect on outcomes of interpersonal interaction. Industrial Marketing Management, 66, 56–63. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.indmarman.2017.06.008

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